Dear Bubba’s Preschool Teacher,
Thank you so much for offering to have Bubba evaluated for fine motor skill delays as I dropped him off for school this morning as you stood in the doorway wiping your runny nose– in front of the other mother’s who cannot seem to just drop their kids off and leave. (but that is a story for another day)
You pointing out that you think he is delayed was so very uplifting to me this morning. I said, “thank you but no. We have had him evaluated – many times- and he passes all benchmarks as far as fine motor skills go. It’s his gross motor skills that we KNOW are lagging.” Thank you for repeating yourself…..several times. Even after I said “no thank you, he’s fine”. Thank you for then saying “but they would come here, to school, do it”. Again, I said “no, he’s fine”. You forced me to pull out the big guns. “HE HAS BEEN EVALUATED. HE HAS A NEUROLOGIST and and ORTHOPEDIST that say his fine motor skills are just fine.” I am more aware than most parents what his skills are……
I am sorry that when you sat him down to watch him, to evaluate him, that he didn’t want to do it. You wanted him to cut that paper. Guess what – he isn’t the most compliant kid in those situations. Maybe because HE HAS DONE THIS PLENTY OF TIMES…..he has been asked more times than the rest of the kids in the class combined to stand up, sit down, hop, touch his toes, make a circle, draw a line, cut paper, bounce a ball and catch a ball….he knows the routine. And guess what HE DOES NOT LIKE IT!
But since I know he can use a pair of scissors, and does so quite nicely- let it go. He colors and draws when he wants to. He has NO interest in learning to write letters – NONE. Let it go. He will – whether it’s this week, this month or next year. He will. Just as every child does – in their own time…and guess what…. I don’t really give to rats butts.
What you don’t know is that his fine motor skills work just fine – when it’s on his terms. Ask him to play a PS3 round of FIFA 2014….Ask him to use the touchpad on his brother’s laptop and pull up Nick Jr games all by himself. Ask him to call his dad at work using my smartphone. Get in the floor with him and color – don’t ask him to write his name….ask him to stand on a kitchen stool and help you cut veggies for a salad (because yes I do let him do that).
What you seemed to forget is that while YOU think I care two hoots if he is writing his name at 4 years old – and I get that a lot of parents are hung up on this….but not me. What I really care about is that he is around friends and can play and have some fun. What I care about is that my child, born “just a tad too early'”, survived a GRADE THREE freaking brain bleed with very little long term damage done.What I care about is that he has no long term lung damage. What I care about is that he has no heart problems. What I care about is that he has no problems eating, nope, no food aversions here.
What I care about is that my little miracle baby is ALIVE and well. Because he is well – and he is going to be JUST FINE –
Even if he doesn’t want to cut the damn paper!
Thank you again,
(Disclaimer – I do know that she had he best intentions when she talked to me this morning. Swear – but when I said no thank you for the 3rd time…she should have stopped)