Toddlers, Tiara’s and Train Wrecks

Hello my name is Amy and I’m addicted to Toddler’s and Tiaras.  IT’S my TRAIN WRECK.

I can’t stop watching it.  I am fascinated by how absolutely RIDICULOUS these MOM’S act!!!  And I can’t get over how RIDICULOUS the mom’s look. 

I get it, they want their daughters all GLAMMED up and being told they are pretty because they are absolute LARGE DOGS!!!  (Did I say that out loud?)  Have you noticed that too?  There might be 1 out of 10 mom’s that are shown on the TV show that don’t look like they ate their way thru a McDonald’s once or twice. 

Even weirder…a 3 year old getting a spray tan AND fake finger nails….REALLY?  I’m all for a little dress up and fun but come on – spray tanning a 3 year old!!!  HELLLOOO…makes no sense at all.

And they think it’s normal……gives them a nice sunshiny orange glow.  (So does a nuclear power plant)

And the money that is spent on the dresses and costumes for their “talents”.  (Nothing like a 2 or 3 year old performing their talents)

Like when a bad storm hits a small town and the news reporters always find the guy with the least amount of teeth and clothes…Toddles and Tiara’s manages to find every BUBBA momma from a small town that sounds like she fell off the turnip truck  - I don’t get it – I swear I don’t.  But I can’t stop watching.

I. JUST. CANNOT. STOP! 

Inspector Gadget

My boys, 14yo and almost 12 yo, have cell phones.  And they text.  The only person they actually talk to on their phone is me or their daddy.  TEXTING is it.

So one of my girlfriends called me yesterday, her oldest is almost 12 as well.  And she just got a phone. 

Girlfriend wanted to know if I checked my boys texts.  What do I do about auto delete?  Do I monitor all of that.

Answer – YEAH I do.

I know, I’m Inspector of the Gadgets!  But I have to.  I do random phone checks all the time.  I let them see me checking their phone.  I also let their friends KNOW that I check the phones. Some nights I’ll take their phones and keep them.  Watching the texts just roll in.  And when little Lucy texts and says “why aren’t you texting back?”  I say, “hey little Lucy” it’s Crash/Pootie’s mommy and they are in bed.  Sorry.  And then little Lucy says “oh I’m sorry Crash/Pootie’s mommy…Goodnight”.

We’re all on the same page. 

And when the friends say dirty words on Pooties facebook page I say “Hey friend, LANGUAGE please”.  (stop laughing, I know that you know I can drop a dirty word, or twenty, everyone thought Bubba’s first word was going to be SH*T) and then friend says “sorry Mrs. W” and we move on. 

Point is, I love my children, and as long as I am paying for the ding dang phone – I’m checking what is being said/text.

I’m on a break

I’m on a blogging break, still reading all my favorites, just no writing.

What am I doing? 

I’m on my political soap box about the pay for performance testing here in CMS.

Bawk Bawk

The big kids are home from school today…it’s a teacher workday.  It’s April Fools Day.   Not a holiday but a “workday”.

 

So it’s 8 am, Bubba and I are downstairs, he’s playing with his toys, pitching a fit because he wants to go wake them up……it is just making him madder and madder!  He keeps asking me to call them. “Momma call dem”.  “Momma go get dem”.  “I go get dem”.  “I go upstairs”.  Poor kid.

I am sitting here wanting to watch Grey’s Anatomy from last.  I’m too afraid to watch it.  Is that weird?  I know that it will be an emotional roller coaster ride with Callie, the baby, the car accident, McSteamy (aka Mark, hunkahunka)

I think I’m going to be mad..  I want Callie to have the baby!