Truths of the Breakfast Club

def·i·ni·tion   /ˌdɛfəˈnɪʃən/ Show Spelled [def-uh-nish-uhn]

noun

1.  the act of making definite, distinct, or clear; a defining: We need a better definition of her responsibilities.

2.  the formal statement of the meaning or significance of a word, phrase, idiom, etc., as found in dictionaries. An online dictionary resource, such as Dictionary.com, can give users direct, immediate access to the definitions of a term, allowing them to compare definitions from various dictionaries and stay up to date with an ever-expanding vocabulary.

3.  the condition of being definite, distinct, or clearly outlined: His biceps have great muscle definition.

4.  Optics. sharpness of the image formed by an optical system.

5.  Radio and Television. the accuracy of sound or picture reproduction.

I had a very interesting conversation with my friend yesterday.  Interesting but very sad. 

We were talking about her daughter who is now 15.  She is a beautiful girl.  I’ve known her since she was a baby.  Forever, this sweet, beautiful young girl has been a fabulous athlete.  She has defined herself as a TOP ATHLETE.

Now at 15, she doesn’t feel (whether true or not) that she is still at the TOP.  She said she doesn’t know who she is if she’s not the “top”athlete.  It broke my heart. 

When Crash’s middle school soccer season came to end back in the spring, he was so sad.  Only word for it.  SAD.  They won their conference, but he was sad.    It took me a couple days to figure out where the funk was coming from….but I finally figured it out.  It was over.  He was no longer the looked at soccer guy.  Soccer was over.  He was no longer a captain.  There was nothing left to “be”.  They won.  Season over. 

He SAID it to me – which made it even more real. 

The look in his eyes made me want to cry for him.

Sunday morning, I saw the same sadness in his eyes.  His first year of High School Soccer just came to end this past Saturday night when the Varsity team lost in the 4th round of state playoffs.  He was sad it was over.  It has been a part of who he was since summer started.  He went to EVERY 8:00 am training session – all summer.  He went to every practice all season.  He became “brother’s” with these boys, some of whom he would not have been friends with were it not for soccer.  (Let’s be honest, the upperclass men….9th grader..you get it.)

And now it’s over.  His sadness extends to the seniors on the team…their sadness at the END of what was an amazing season (they went undefeated until Saturday night).  Crash said, “Mom, for a couple of these guys, it might have been the last time they play a competitive game.”

I get it kid.

It’s part of you – June thru November you were a PHS Soccer Player. 

So now that is over (even temporarily)  …..you keep asking yourself

WHAT are you?  WHO are you? Are the guys on the team still your “brothers”?

Makes me think of the Breakfast Club. 

Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
Andrew Clark: ... and an athlete...
Allison Reynolds: ... and a basket case...
Claire Standish: ... a princess...
John Bender: ... and a criminal...
Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club

 

(FYI:  I think adults struggle with how we define ourselves, our identity, too. I personally think women are the WORST- to each other and ourselves!  Ya know, there are folks that give you that look like they just smelled a fart…..”OHHHHH, you’re a stay at home mom.”  Drives me freaking nuts….because I do define myself as a stay at home mom and wife.  But that’s a tale for another day)